Further Unschooling Thoughts

Hi again!

Some of the comments from my last post have got me thinking a little more (just when I had all the answers, too!) about the place of obedience in education/life. So here are more thoughts!

I tend to think that obedience is of two sorts - obedience out of fear, and the free assent of the will. Both types are common in the world (possibly even necessary - more thoughts on that perhaps in a later post), but the second is definitely the higher and more useful obedience.

An example of the two (which also provides an illustration of the place of obedience through fear) would be in repentance. One can either repent out of fear of punishment, or because one has offended somebody dear to one and is thus sincerely sorry. People being people, a lot of repentance comes from the first - this is, of course, a feature of religion, and is not a bad thing (repentance is good regardless of its source!). But, as Catholic theology recognises by terming the second sort "perfect contrition", it is a higher and better thing to repent simply because one has done wrong, regardless of the prospect or otherwise of punishment.

After that little digression (lol), back to obedience.

I think the aim of education - in this area - ought to be to gain the willing assent of children to the precepts and instructions of their parents. Obviously, this is a long-term goal that is only achievable when children are mature (it's almost certainly unreasonable to expect a 3-year-old to do this), but long-term goals must inform our short-term actions.

So. Parents should seek to model virtues, and respect, in order to lead by example rather than fear. If they are successful in this, their children will (probably!) recognise their parents' wisdom/experience and "good" life - which then pre-disposes them to listen to parents. Also, if parents have built this sort of relationship by displaying these qualities, children will be inclined to respect their parents' words without necessarily needing to have them explained and justified - if I think my parents are, on the whole, reasonable people with a modicum of wisdom, I am much less likely to dismiss what they say out of hand. Instead, I will accord it considerable weight in my thinking.

Of course, this doesn't mean that children will always do as their parents say; but then, nobody ever follows anyone else completely. (I think...) But it does mean that parents have some input with their adult children, and it means that both parties can enjoy a positive, respectful relationship.

Were the obedience to be based on fear, it would (I'd suggest) pass away as the fear passed away. For example, parents can't really enforce very much on teenage children - if things really deteriorate, the children do have the legal right to leave home - so if the relationship has been built upon the parents' ability to punish and coerce the child, their influence is unlikely to endure beyond childhood.

So, attempting to tie all this back together again, I would say that obedience should be sought through respect/love for the person requiring the obedience, not through the fear of any punishments they may inflict. This then requires the person seeking the obedience to display respect, wisdom, and understanding in their relations with the other party.

(This, of course, with the proviso that I am essentially discussing obedience among adults or between parents and older children. The obedient party must have the maturity to think consider their actions in advance, before this sort of obedience becomes possible.)

I hope this makes sense!

L

Unschooling thoughts

Hi again!

I was just reading a post on Cindy's blog (http://www.itisaboutthejourney.blogspot.com/) regarding her thoughts on unschooling, which led me to think a little about my own thoughts on the topic. For what they're worth, here they are:

Hi Cindy,I really enjoyed your thoughts on unschooling - above all, because they made me think about my own opinions on such matters!While my opinions don't have the experience of parenting behind them (I often wonder what effect that would have, lol), I thought I'd share some other thoughts sparked by your post.

I think the fundamental point that occurred to me in all of this, is that the most important thing one can ever teach is behaviours, and the values that inform those behaviours. Knowledge is pointless in itself - it only ever acquires meaning when applied to a particular purpose. Which is where the behaviours and values come in; the key thing is not to know how to do something, but what to do with it.

Examples of this from your post would be your comments about conversation (I tend to think it's one of the best things for a person). I think that good conversation is an essential in any good education - studying from books cannot give the connection to real life that discussion with other people provides. And, of course, in a proper two-way conversation, it's much easier to give people material for thought as well as habits of thought.Also, a good conversation teaches respect for other people's opinions and can often share their enthusiasm - it's very hard to talk to somebody sharing their passion without becoming interested myself. (I'm hoping other people are the same, rather than me being strange!)

Re directing, scheduling, making children study, this ties in with the point about behaviours and values over content.If parents push "important" content on their children (as is often done in schools, too), then what behaviours are being taught?

First, obedience over initiative - the individual's perspective is less important than that of an authority figure. Thus, you should wait to be told what is important.

Second, you have to do things because you are forced - not because you want to. This then teaches a lesson of inactivity at a personal level, or else performance to others' standards. It does not teach people to do what they believe is right, simply because they believe it. I tend to think that this is the only sustainable foundation for anything useful (virtue, happiness, respect, "success").

Third, the content itself is being learnt not for its own sake, but simply to satisfy someone else's requirements. This is similar to cramming for an exam - in both cases, the information is remembered long enough to meet the external need, but then discarded because it isn't considered relevant to the individual.

Just a few thoughts of my own; I'm sure when I have children I'll be completely different, lol!

Luke

Hi!

Having finally figured out how it's done, I've established a blog. I'm hoping to share my thoughts on me, life, current events, and anything else that takes my interest.

And keeping in touch with friends never hurts, either. :)

Luke